So much TV, So little sleep, Such a great deal of sarcasm.

This self portrait is called "Yes, I took 12 pictures to get this one...I am a mess."

My tour is over...officially...and I am so effing tired I could...oh wait...I just passed out.

I am a bit blue, happy, hungry, full, antsy, comatose, expectant...I, basically,  have all the feelings...

So many awesome things happened in the last 3 months ...topped by the amazing trip to South Africa (did you hear that I was there? and when my pal, Mike, flew out to SOUTH AFRICA to surprise me....TO SOUTH AFRICA!!! THAT is good people. We love him.

There are so many stories to tell...but I have a few thoughts that have crossed my mind since I got home...not a lot of substance...just things that gave me pause.

I can't wax poetical...I am too effing tired...but I can be cheeky and sarcastic...that doesn't take much.

Remember, a lot of the following comes from my need to become a hermit after a tour and watch as much TV as a person can take...and talk to no one for days...and be judgemental. 

I would thank you to please keep all that in mind.

1. I felt the need to watch "The View" this morning just to be pissed off at whatever that effing Elizabeth Hasslebeck had to say about that debate last night. (Obama smoked that "Over-50-Over-Tanned-Ken-Doll", Romney, who had NO IDEA what he was talking about...ever...he would be an awesome president...OPPOSITE DAY...and his official shoe? The FLIP FLOP! BURN!!!) 

In the end I didn't watch The View...it was for the best...I hate her. 

(If I have the compulsion again later I can watch it on Rogers on Demand.)

2. I watched "Rock Of Ages" on the plane back from Johannesburg...which was a 16 hour flight. 

There was 90 minutes of watching the movie and  then 14 and a half hours of wishing I was on Twitter so I could say something smart ass, like... "The only reason I kept watching Rock Of Ages is because I was trapped on a plane...a Plane WITHOUT Snakes to distract me from this crappola movie." OH MY LORD!! WHAT WAS TOM CRUISE DOING!?!? Besides RUINING A MOVIE!!! So many non singers...so little time...wait!! I had 14 and a half hours to think of it. The crowning glory? WHENEVER Mary J. Blige sang anything. She is awesome...you know who is not awesome? Tom Cruise. And Katie had to ESCAPE from her marriage to him. ESCAPE. Which I could not do from this movie...because I was on a plane.

3. I love the Voice. The new format rocks. That is all.

4. Oh, and Mary J. Blige is a mentor on The Voice. You know who is not a mentor on The Voice? Tom Cruise.

5.  I love anything musical on the ole TV. Especially when my home and native land takes the chance to feature musical people. 'Over the Rainbow' features two of my dear friends as judges...Thom Allison and Louise Pitre. They are awesome and beautiful on the show. I enjoy watching them every week. I have one bone to pick...PLEASE STOP WITH THE DANCERS!!! PLEASE. Just let these sweet girls sing. That is all. 

6. Robert Carlyle is weird on "Once Upon A Time". 

And not a good weird.

That being said, I love "Once Upon A Time".

THAT being said, I would like to point out how ABC/Disney has thrown EVERY character from one of their animated movies into the cast soup to remind you to buy the disk...before it goes back into the Disney Vault FOREVER.  Mulan, really? Come on. I am now waiting for the Anika Noni Rose Frog to appear....with Tom Cruise.

7. I cried 8 times watching my 2 PVR'd episodes of "Grey's Anatomy". Will this craziness ever end? I cannot get enough.

I do love how Sandra Oh's character pointed out that a lot of bad things happen to people who work at Seattle Grace...like all those people who lived in Jessica Fletcher's small town on "Murder She Wrote" (not my joke...can't remember whose.)

8. I have only been home about 24 hours and that is how much TV I have watched. See. This is what I do. Back to "The Voice"....I have 4 more eps. to watch...

Gala Night at the Baxter Theatre in SA and my travels... What days...what a night.

(This was written late Sunday the 15th)

I have been very excited about today.
Today was the day that I got to see all the other acts as we performed in a gala for the FNB Variètè Festival here in (yes, I know...you have heard it one million times now but please...how often does a gal get to do her act in...) South Africa.
You see, all of the artists do our gigs at the same time so we can't see each other work. The FNB is an eclectic festival featuring Marc Lottering, (who hosted the gala as well as performing in a cabaret act) and he is the number one stand up here in (yup) South Africa, and Godfrey Johnson (who is working with Lottering) who is a number one cabaret performer in SA, Tina C, as played by Chris Green, who just finished a sell out run at the Sydney Opera House and Shimmy Issacs, an up and coming FABULOUS stand up who does a majority of her act in Afrikaans.
Just top notch talent...and I was closing...and it made me shit my pants a bit.
The Baxter Theatre, where we did the gala, is lovely and is a theatre that was very important during apartheid struggle, featuring plays, works, dance pieces and other artistic endeavours that centred around the themes of the struggle against oppression.
I looked at the posters in the hallways near the dressing rooms and felt humbled to say the very least.
I sat in the audience for the first act of the gala and watched Marc come onstage as MC and receive that amazing reception that is due an artist of his status and caliber...and the crapping of the pants began. In his act he speaks in very fast English mixed with Afrikaans, and the audience ate it up...he is absolutely hysterical and has the confidence of one who is at the top of their game. It is amazing to hear stand up in a different language...hearing the cadence of the stories and the build up to the punch line...Marc is a great storyteller...and you don't have to speak the language to get the story.
Tina C came on and with a bravery that I can't imagine, Chris Green portrays an over 40, post plastic surgery, country and western star from the American Bible Belt...who reminds one of a Texan version on Malibu Barbie...singing about the economic downfall and other issues close to her sequinned heart...and before you know it the whole audience is line dancing...yes, all 600, to a C and W version of 'Dancing Queen'. Riotous.
Godfrey came on and joined Marc for their set. It was so interesting to watch two wonderful performers from different entertainment worlds come together and put together a piece...witty, funny and so musical...and again...featuring some humour that is very specific to SA.
The crapping continued.
I ran down to my dressing room during the interval and put on my dress...and I just tried to grasp it all...to put it all in proportion...there was a great gravity in my soul...it all felt very important all of a sudden...that I was in a show with these amazing performers and I felt a world apart. I want to make it clear here that all the performers and people here could not have made me feel more welcome...I just felt like I had walked out of my comfort zone. AND it became clear how far outside said zone I was when Shimmy got onstage and the audience went wild for her...but as I said earlier, her act was 98% in Afrikaans so I could not understand it ...but I knew she was killing...and I was next...I turned to Cooch and said with full meaning, "I can't remember being this nervous before..."

I was filled with "will they like me?"..."will they get me?"..."this is a whole different place...am I accessible enough?"..."lord, oh lord...I have come so far...I so want to kill this....please, let me kill this..."
I stood off stage, going over my abridged 15 minutes of material in my head, and Sammy the stage manager handed me my mike and smiled. I drew a large yoga breath and thought, "enjoy yourself"....

After Marc introduced me I bounded onstage in my Fashion Crimes dress and high heels and looked out into the mouth of this huge audience...yes, as i said, they were suitably huge...
And I just went at it...

Magic...from the first laugh to the last...
And, at the end when I threw my hands in the air, I closed my eyes and took it all in...there was an unbelievable reaction...it was something, let me tell you...I took the moment...and I looked out and saw that most of the audience had their hands up as well...and there were chants of "more" as I ran offstage...had a little cry....
Magic.
They got me...and I got them...and how we made fancy magic together.
Thanks to the universe...this journey constantly surprises and amazes.

George took this pic...I am in the spotlight...but look at Cooch...it was amazing....

Speaking of amazing.

I wanted to meet some penguins...and then I did...what a day off we had...not only did I meet penguins, but also baboons, a sprinkbok,  saw a whale, lots of seals, ate ice cream made from a 2000 (?) year old recipe, laughed and laughed...saw the most amazing sunset I have ever seen...drove through a rainbow...

Here are a couple pics from the last couple days... Betty's Bay, Robben Island, Imizamo Yethu Township...so many places...I am full.
Thanks for reading...I am 3 shows away from finishing a 44 show, 5 City, 4 country tour...my longest yet. I can think of no better way to end it.
What a year.

Sharp's Bay...the weather is a comin'

Our little group at Sharps Bay...SO WINDY!!!

George and I at Sharps Bay!!!

Hello Penguin Colony in Betty's Bay

Mama and Baby at Betty's Bay!

Sundown on the way back from Hermanus where we saw 2 whales....

We drove through this rainbow...WE DROVE THROUGH A RAINBOW!!!

George, Rob and Myself at Cafe Jack in Betty's Bay...we laughed our shit off here....

Hout Bay

George and I go to Imizamo Yethu Township  and our guide is the fabulous Afrika Moni...we found out a day later that two police were shot here a day before our visit...we were greeted ALWAYS with kindness and joy every where Afrika took us.

Imizamo Yethu...this house isn't much bigger than the house the people live in...but they always paint it when they paint their house...

This lady was lovely and filled with humour....

On our way to Robben Island, which was a leper colony, insane asylum and home to hundreds of political prisoners during Apartheid....

The waters were VERY choppy on the way over....

The Yard.

The Yard

The gates

Block B, Cell 7 which Nelson Mandela lived in for 18 years...and wrote "The Long Walk to Freedom"...he his the manuscript outside in the garden that he planted.

Block D. The man in the centre is named Sparks, he was a resident of this Block for 7 years. His crime was terrorism. He was a member of the ANC. It was amazing to hear him tell his story. All of the guides on the island are ex political prisoners.

South Africa, Friggen Adele and NYC REVIEW!

Holy poop, I am in Africa.
South Africa, to be exact...Cape Town to be even more specific.
It has occured to me that it is the first time that anyone from my family has been this far south of the equator...again, holy poop.
It took about 30 hours to get here...the crowning glories of that was the Ativan and the family that didn’t show up to sit in the 3 seats beside me, therefore freeing up a space of 4 seats between me and Georgie on a 14 hour flight. Score.
(FYI: Cooch fell asleep in the TO airport and was never truly awake again. Little lamb)
I watched two episodes of America’s Next Top Model (suck it, judgers) the movie Brave...another movie that was so awesome I promptly have forgotten what it was (it could have been the Ativan) and 7 episodes of the Season 1 of “The Good Wife” (HOW have I not watched this till now...I loves.)
Then I arrived in Johannesburg and was met by fabulous people and a “Mean Girls” convention...and not in the good way...like...it wasn’t people who loved the movie and recognized me...that is never shitty...let us be honest...BUT a bunch of pretty girls (LIKE 30 of them) who, when I asked them a question about what rows the plane was boarding promptly looked at me like I had said, “I just dipped myself in poo, wanna sniff?”...and they said that they could not help me.
Which is amazing because it seems all anyone wants to do in South Africa is help you out. It is really a wonder. The best service, the kindest people...and some of the lovliest views I have ever seen...and I have not left my hotel very much yet...so that is saying something.
Today, I am planning my sightseeing and writing this blog before I do so many things that I can’t remember an effing thing.
I got here and THE NEXT DAY got into my venue, did a sound check and then did a show!! WHAT THE WHAT!?!?
It is a spectacular venue...wait...here it is...

 

Taj Hotel Lobby, South Africa

 

Can you take how fancy it is?
And Cooch has a grand piano...and the audience was just lovely...I am back in a cabaret style space...and I forgot how much I love it...fancy couches...wing back chairs...so many amazing things...a dude gave me a cup of tea that came with a sand timer...to show me when it had steeped...it is the simple joys, really.
The next day we all were off...and we went to the Greenmarket to see what the flea market had to offer...there is a hard sell going on people...and this Canadian gal can hardly walk away...these vendors bring their entire shop, including the booth with all the tables...with them every day...it is astounding, really. 

We love the instagram and Cooch is especially good at it.

That night we (George, Cooch and myself) went with our new friend and fellow cabaret artist from London, Chris Green, to a place recommended to us by a pal...it is called Marco’s and it offers authentic SA cuisine...and a floor show.
When we came in there was a band on marimbas and drums and they were singing, playing and dancing...and it kept on...
While they performed we ordered our dinner (Of things such as springbok, ostrich and kudu) and watched a koo koo night unfold.
There were many characters...a surly waitress, a sinister (Chris Green’s words) boobie lady, a high heeled traveller...so many...but before I go any farther...I want to tell you the food was grand and the restaurant was awesome...there was just a koo-koo-ness about it all, people.
The band was so hard working and there were three women who fronted it and, as I said earlier, they danced, sang and played the instuments...and then this woman insterted herself...she had on a tightwasted trench coat that seemed to be a part of her emsemble...she wore it over a blouse of some sort...but she had it undone to just above her belly button...and she was jumping and dancing...and she had some of the biggest boobs I have ever seen. I could not tell if the band knew her or was just tolerating her OR was simply happy to let her do some of the work for them. This woman was stalking the club like a cheetah...and she was bringing men and women up to the stage...and one woman she brought up had a 6 inch heel on...and this high heeled traveller had had a few...I thought she was gonna go over like the Titanic. She started to come towards our table and Chris Green said he would pretend to be overwrought (which he did) and I would console him (which I tried to do)...Sinister Boobie Lady looked at me and told me she “Wanted ME” and I told her I was sick...and vaguely pointed towards my middle section (Universe forgive me) and then I pointed at Cooch...she took him...sorry, Cooch. And then she came back and I had turned my head from Chris Green for one second and then she had him too... (FYI: George told her he had a heart condition....Universe forgive him, too)
WELL, the dancing that happened with Chris and Cooch was epic and these two pictures don’t do them justice...the blur is because they were moving so effing fast...I laughed so hard I coughed up a lung.
 



 

 

When they came back to the table the three ladies began to sing...so beautifully...in another language...and I could recognize the tune but not place it...and then slowly they slipped into english... “Never mind I’ll find someone like you...”...fucking Adele...lord, is there a place on this earth that woman has NOT invaded.
The food came...it was awesome...we laughed and ate...and a wonderful night was had by all!!
Yesterday, we went to Victoria Wharf, which has a gorgeous mall and the best view of Robben Island that I have seen yet (please, keep in mind we have many more places to go!). Robben Island was where Nelson Mandela was held for 27 years...also a leper colony...among other things...and I cannot wait to visit.
I just stopped writing to look out my window to see a whale splashing around in the harbour...lord...it was singing Adele, too. (Wouldn’t that be hysterical?)
There are so many places I want to see.
I am so honoured that I was asked to come here.
My second show was another excellent experience. I love my room. My soundman. The grand piano...being in a dressing room with all these amazing international performers...we are talking Brel, Brecht and Britney. It is a mash up, people.
I have 12 more days here, 9 shows and one big gala night.
This gig is really a dream come true.
Here are some of my shots, so far...plus a lovely review I just got for my NEW YORK CITY run of #GOLD! 

Cooch sleeping began....

View out of my hotel window

Plaque just outside my performance space.

Night window view.

There is a big mountain at the top of that street that the sun is blocking...but I like the pic of me and G.

Beautiful

The Irish pub we found in South Africa on Canadian ThanksGiving.

 

And, thanks to Andrew Martin of NiteLifeExchange for this lovely review of my shows in NEW YORK CITY!!!

Sharron Matthews: Still a Superstar

When singer Sharron Matthews first emerged on the New York nightlife scene three seasons ago, she went so far out on a limb as to bill herself as a "superstar" and claim this was the start of her "world domination tour." Indeed, a large section of the cabaret cognoscenti could scarcely believe that a virtual unknown, from as far away as Canada yet, would have the unmitigated gall to label herself thusly. But it was soon clear why the lady

wholeheartedly deserves that moniker

With her powerhouse presence and spectacular pipes besides a gift for humor that borders on genius, Matthews has since played on stages worldwide to ovation after spectacular ovation, including London, the Edinburgh Fringe Festival and currently, South Africa. She's also conquered film and television in major motion pictures and Canadian series. And when she recently came to Flute Bar in the Gramercy Park area (which, though perhaps not the greatest venue for her because of its intimacy and odd interior layout), she proved once again that she may be the most exciting thing to have happened in cabaret since Bette Midler at the Continental Baths.

Matthews's musical selections center around the art of the "mashup," relying almost solely of a pop sensibility, and this most recent show provides more of the same. From the outset, when she mixes Pink's "I'm Comin' Up" with "I've Got the Music in Me," the roller coaster ride has merely begun to soar to the skies. After some hilarious commentary as always, this time about the Kardashians, she completely knocks it out of the park with "The Glamorous Life" by Sheila E mixed with "Paparazzi," and she couldn't possibly do better than with what she calls her "Hooker Medley 2012," featuring Donna Summer's "Bad Girls," "Lady Marmalade" by Patti LaBelle, and "Acid Queen" by The Who. A final standout is Tom Eyen and Henry Krieger's "One Night Only" from Dreamgirls merged with "Call Me" by Blondie.

Again, Flute Bar, although bordering on elegant, isn't really exactly in the running to compete with such other more appropriate spaces in which Matthews has performed here in the Big Apple, such as Joe's Pub. But the simple fact remains that regardless of where she performs, the formidable talents of Sharron Matthews simply transform any club into a happening event. 

When next she returns to New York, she must be seen, savored and shared.

RIP The Princess of Wales Theatre.

When I was in 'Les Mis' (the first time) at the Royal Alex back in 1991, I got up early one morning to go to the ground breaking of the new theatre that the Mirvish were building. 

The Princess of Wales.

There was a note up at the Alex from the Mirvish that they hoped we would all come down to the empty lot see the big event taking place. We all grumbled and groaned...and we  felt it was bit manditory...but we were all so glad we went.

When do you get to see the ground breaking for a new expensive, exciting theatre...when?! IN CANADA!?! WHEN!?

We saw the model for the new space, then there was a banner that unfurled with "Miss Saigon" on it...and there was a golden spade that was used by Ed Mirvish...was it Ed or David...my memory fails me a bit...but the day was sunny and I was 23 years old...all was possible, people.

All the Les Mis-ers went out for breakfast and talked about these possibilities.

THAT was a very exciting time.

'Les Mis' was running, 'Phantom' was running...'Aspects of Love' was just starting...I had begun the million auditions and call backs that I had for 'Showboat' (one of the first shows that originated in TO to make it to Broadway...along with 'Kiss of the Spiderwoman') we did a big concert version of 'Chess' on the Alex stage with a huge orchestra and all the cast from 'Les Mis', 'Phantom' and "Aspects of Love' ....and then 'Crazy for You' came along...'Miss Saigon,', of course...'Sunset Boulevard'...there was an amazing workshop/festival that Garth Drabinsky brought up to the North York Centre for the Performing Arts...where they did workshops for "Songs For A New World", "Ragtime"...a musical version of Anne Rice's "Cry to Heaven"...among other amazing projects...yes, most of the these workshops were populated with Americans that Garth brought up (in a 64 person cast of 'Showboat' there were only 6 Canadians) but I am firmly convinced that I would not have gotten to play a lead in 'Beauty and the Beast' if it were not for that Showboat credit... 'Beauty and the Beast...Rent...Jane Eyre.....Mamma Mia followed much later....as I said, it was an exciting time...all things were possible.

It seemed like there were at least 2 auditions a week...American casting directors were coming up to cast for US Tours and for Broadway...and it felt like it was only going to get better...well, we all know what happened...was it SARS? The dollar, the economy....or do we really have a finite audience here? Who knows.

It was a wonderful time when there was great excitement about many things...but one of the most exciting for myself and many others was the interest that there was surrounding Canadian musical theatre performers. Magic.

And the Mirvish built that wonderful theatre...the Princess of Wales was and is truly glorious.

I have had the good fortune to perform in two productions there...'Beauty and the Beast' and, 7 years after playing a swing in the chorus of 'Les Mis' I got to come the Princess of Wales as Madame Thenardier, alongside Colm Wilkinson, in a North American tour of the show...lord...full circle. I was so effing nervous on opening night that I promised myself that  if I made it through without vomiting, falling over or majorly effing up the words I would consider myself a success. It was an amazing night. I was brought to Cameron Mackintosh at the opening night party...yes, brought...and he and I sat and had a conversation...he was very kind and complimentary...and I went to the bathroom after and wept. 

The closing night of 'Beauty and the Beast'  at the Princess of Wales, we were all at the party and Ed and Anne Mirvish left hastily. We found out that Princess Diana had died in a car accident a few hours earlier. As we walked by the front of the theatre the flowers had already begun to collect.

When I heard the news of the...what shall we call it...removal...of the Princess of Wales I was sad...but not surprised really. 

David Mirvish has always loved art and architecture. More than the theatre? Who can say?  

Ed Mirvish loved the theatre...he used to come to visit us at the Alex all the time...coming through the crew room to say hello to us before the show. Olden times, people.

I have to say, I agree with Richard Ouzounian on this...if we can't fill the theatres, why not try to use the space in another way.

I know a bunch of you are freaking as I say this...but why waste the space?

People aren't coming to big theatre like they used to.

Nothing has a long run...unless it is a juke box musical...and that went the way of Mamma Mia...that was the last...We Will Rock You and Rock of Ages couldn't even keep it going.

I do wonder why the Mirvish blocked Aubrey Dan from getting a theatre in TO, only to bulldoze the Princess. It seems a bit selfish.

I know Dan has gone his way...he tried to do some theatre here...not in the way that everyone wanted him to...but what might have been different if he had had the Pantages...maybe not much...but who knows?

The bulldozing seems like a huge waste of money...but, it is his money, I guess...so what can we say?

I am glad for companies like Acting Up Stage...who are executing exciting contemporary musical pieces that people are flocking to and their casts are different every year...pulling from all of our amazing musical theatre performers.

Maybe the era of the big musical is done.

Maybe this is the time of smaller works,  independent producers and performers...people creating their own work...people generating their own audiences...touring our works around the world! 

I do wish that there was more work for our musical theatre performers. I do wish that Canada would take us and our work more seriously. BUT it is what it is. We will lose our performers to NY and to London...which is maybe not a bad thing...maybe they will go away and come back and take this country by storm. What if?

If you think something is the end...then it is...or we can create a more exciting future. 

I do think it is up to us.

P.S. or whatever one writes to add something! 
I forgot the wonderful Angelwalk Theatre Company...in that very theatre complex where I did the Showboat and a bunch of my own cabarets up in North York...doing amazing, contemporary equity musicals...I saw their 'Title of Show" and loved loved loved it. WAY TO GO!!! 
SEE all the new theatre cropping up!!!
Be hopeful and brave my people!