Sunday, January 28, 2007

Grease-ie

I got chills....they're judge-e-fying....and I'm losing control ......cause the performing they're providing...is........well.....hmm.......I am unsure how I feel!
Kinda nonplussed, really
Grease...Who Is The One That I Want?
First of all....that ONJ ....she got some work done, eh? Not judgin'....just stating fact....one day someone may say that about me....and I hope that it won't be true...I hope to grow old gracefully........please dear god...give me strength.
That makes me sound one hundred years old......
So....
If you watch the show....read on.. if not and it you already feel the judgement of me starting.....go look at Playbill or People on-line.........

The Danny's
They Don't seem to have alot to choose from here.

Wholesome Danny ( these catch names kill me, really)
Derek...can't remember what he sang but was impressed that he started the show and didn't totally shit his pants on live TV...will probably get my vote tonight
Hot Danny
Austin...okay guys ....he looks like a living characature of Harry Connick Jr.....am I wrong??? And he didn't put his arms down once and he stalked the stage like a Chippendale's dancer....someone called me during the show and commented that this is the kinda dude that travels through Toronto in a touring company and thinks he is hot shit...to which I laughed and then ......agreed a bit!
Second Chance Danny
Matt....they ( read David Ian) loved him in the Academy but he couldn't sing....guess what...still can't.....oooh baby......while he sang the last note of Pretty Woman I covered my eyes........sidebar....those poor two people that they brought back....they all but called them Loser Danny and Sandy.....
Slacker Danny
Max....he is my favourite.....wait!!!!!! I am gonna vote for him.....George thinks he isn't right.......he thinks he is Doody.....the character Doody ....not poop......he needs an image consultant......
Boy Band Danny
Jason......he was in Altar Boys.....so Austin should shut up about being the only one to have experience.....Just shut it, Austin!.....sadly, I find him boring. Yup....that's alI I have to say.
Bellhop Danny
Kevin....isn't it nice when the only thing that they ( read Billy Bush) can find interesting about you is that you carry peoples luggage? All I could think while he was singing the lyrics " But I'm as blue as a boy could be." was if you are so blue then STOP SMILING for shitsakes!!!!
Ambitious Danny
Chad......okay....alot to say here....he reminded me of Donny Osmond....had a bad outfit ...but I liked him until right at the end of Signed, Sealed, Delivered he just spazzed right out...I looked at it a couple times ......it was just....ah well....his hairline is not right for Danny.

The Sandy's
Now this, my friends, is anyone's game....some of these girls are just awesome but whoever is doing their clothes should be shot.........bridesmaid dresses in all colours and then two slutty short ensembles with Peter-Pan-Get-Away-Boots.....and if you are old enough to know what that means and you are still reading this.....you are my peeps.

Emotional Sandy
Ashley A.......the A stands for....."AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I shoulda quit while I looked alright" ........She cried through the whole Academy week........she looks the part to the Nth degree but cannot....I repeat...cannot sing...and she is carrying more baggage then Bellhop Danny. Oh dear.....she was the one that they brought back because they ( read David Ian) just could not accept that she so looked the part but couldn't sing. Helloooo.
Serious Sandy
Kate ....lo----o-----ve her!!!! She sang All By Myself and just cranked the shit outta it....she isn't as pretty as some....but I like her.....she is kinda gritty!
Baby Sandy
Allie....spent her whole song trying to get over her bad outfit....she wore 5 inch heels and fell during the song....and then at the end of the show when they show the best parts of performances over again....guess which part they showed???? I think she was fine.....too distracted.
Smalltown Sandy
Laura....truly bad outfit number two......but I kinda liked her she is pretty.... and sang well....but general note....please people....put down your arms............
wow......I really am glad that I am so perfect that I can critique all these people........I pause here to search my soul.....should I continue???
Yes.
Spiritual Sandy
Kathleen ....I joked just before they nicknamed her that she was going to be called Jesus' Sandy......I wasn't far wrong......I though it was ironic that they gave her a song that she had to sing the word Hell 8 times in.....she was good........sings good...pretty....a bit milk toast.....but who knows?
Ballerina Sandy
Ashley S......the S stands for......I am SOOOOO gonna be Sandy.......she blew that kiss at the end...ug...but I think the job is between her and.....
Rock Chick Sandy
Julianna.....she ain't very rocky but I think that they are runnin' outta names........George noticed that she had a bat in the stage left cave for the whole song...and due to the fact that she has large nostrils.....oh....better her than me...I like her too.....she has a great look and I think she sings pretty.........
Who knows???

I can't get enough.....I was takin' notes......I think I take my blog too seriously.....wait....soul search????
NOPE!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ooh, I just don't know how long I can handle this show. I watched parts of it tonight and I only really liked Max. We saw Jason in Altar Boyz far too many times and he was soooo... not good. He is the only person who has been in Altar Boyz that I have NOT liked. :(

I liked your recap a lot though. You're so amusing!

karen said...

Please promise to keep doing these recaps! This was enjoyable. :)

I like Max, too...at least he has personality and seems somewhat authentic! That Austin guy drives me crazy, though...he's so full of himself! (And, as Gillian said, we saw Jason in Altar Boyz and...yeah...not so much a fan. ;))

That Sandy that they brought back who had been kicked off? I think there was a reason she wasn't chosen the first time. My ears were bleeding!

"Spiritual Sandy" was my favourite catch name...and I also thought about the number of times she said hell in that song, hahahaha!

My favourite part of the show is when they try to come up with nice ways to say "wow, you sucked and I have nothing nice to say!" Usually they go with the "you LOOK great! I mean, you just LOOK really fantastic...(i might work on the whole singing and dancing thing)...BUT YOU LOOK GREAT!!!"

Sharron Matthews said...

I loved that they just kept talking about how they looked....how Hollywood.....
" You sounded like shit but you are soooooo pretty!"