Sunday, October 13, 2013
My Thanksgiving Thankful List 2013...Spoiler: Large Boxes of Wine is on it.
Well, everyone reading this made it to Thanksgiving 2013.
That is always the first thing I am grateful for on Thanksgiving...being here...being healthy...only having to deal with a bad back and sometimes, because I am a woman over 40, having to clench my thighs together when I sneeze...if you know what I mean...you know what I mean.
I would now, in no particular order, like to list the things I am thankful for.
Thank you in advance for reading...and I encourage you to write your own list today...have a wonderful day...AND wear stretchy pants to dinner.
SHARRON'S 2013 Thankful Thanksgiving List
1. Stretchy Pants
2. Benefibre (changed my life)
3. George...again...this is in no particular order.
4. Hot Sunny Days That Are Unexpected...like yesterday. I was just telling George about how I waxing poetical about a day in the 90's when I was walking around on October 13th in shorts...well, yesterday was October 12th and I was in shorts...that will do it.
5. Cassie The Dog...I hope she is in heaven giving that haughty stare to one million mid sized black dogs. (Her nemisis).
6. Tyson the Dog...who is presently working the sadness of the house and using it to sleep on our bed every night...he is 120 pounds...most nights, to get any sleep with this huge fart factory in our bed, we have to take either Melatonin or a sleeping pill to sleep...worth it.
7. Large Boxes of Wine...see...I told you...self explanatory.
8. Getting Into A Car That Is Already Filled with Gas. See Number 3.
9. My Family. Most of them. They know who they are.
10. My Dear Dear Dear Friends. Most of them. They ALSO know who they are. *Seriously...thanks for all the kindness shown to us in the past week since our girl dog died. Truly.
11. Subcategory to Number 11: Friends Who Are Willing To Talk With Me On The Phone As I Drive Back And Forth from Stratford to Toronto and back. That is a long fucking drive...done many times...I have learned so many wonderful things about these dear people on these drives, hooked up to my IPHONE driving the back roads of Southern Ontario.
Heh Heh...I said "BackRoads".
12. ALL PEOPLE who read my blogs, comment (positively) on my Facebook, follow, read and/or reply to my twitter, like my instagrams and celebrate the social media whorie-ness of it all. AND ALSO all the people who just click delete or hide me in their feed instead of telling me what a social media whore I am...and how it offends them. SO BASICALLY awesome people who enjoy or politely ignore the social media ride and NOT the Hater VanHatersteins. AND ANYONE who has ever come to one of my shows...except for the dude from the New Christian Newspaper who came to see "Jesus Thinks I'm Funny" in Edinburgh and then said my voice was shrill. Again, Shrill is one of my colours. YOU can suck it.
13. Those Flavour Squirt Things For Water. Thank you. (Keep your inappropriate and gross jokes to yourself.)
14. Scented Candles. Dogs that fart. Enough said.
15. Fresh Sheets.
16. Hellavu Dip...this ALSO goes in the list of things I am NOT thankful for, FYI.
17. Naps. All Naps. Especially naps that turn into 10 hours of sleep.
18. My Bicycle.
19. Love. Love is awesome.
20. Grey's Anatomy. I just...it is so...I can barely...it is awesome.
21. My Life. It is truly something.
I wish you all a wonderful day filled with warmth and love...and just...everything.